you’ve gotta believe we are magic
Another “You’ve come a long way, baby” entry, because I am continually baffled by the rapid (and yet interminably slow) passage of time.
This entry was a year ago today. Has it really only been only a year since Dark Ride opened? Many of the people I’d never laid eyes on until that show are still very much parts of my life. The gypsy character from that entry is now one of my favorite karaoke pals, and just left me a voicemail this past Saturday night identifying himself as “You know, Uncle Pervy.” He can’t imagine how important his advice and insight have been to me this year.
Two years ago, I was about to hook up with my very first person post-Bill, who just happened to be an old pseudo-ex and friend. Aah, blasts from the past. I’d really missed this guy, and his visit was such a huge fucking turning point in my life. I realized that I wasn’t, in fact, emotionally dead. After the drama of the previous year, that was so nice to know.
Three years ago, I was on the verge of losing the only real best friend I’d ever had and heading into the most terrifying time of my entire life. It is comforting to me to know that my heart will never be that broken and my life will never be that frightening and that I will never feel that alone again. Thank god for emotional scar tissue - because while it might take you longer to break through later, at least you know that it can’t kill you. This is always good to remember.
nursery rhyme
My coteacher taught the kids this at circle time today, since we are talking about both space and the days of the week. Now I can’t seem to get it out of my head.
On Wednesday night I lost my friend,
And where do you think I found her?
Up on the moon,
Singing a tune,
With all the stars around her.
Plus ca change, plus c’est la meme chose
Found this entry and this entry today. I know, there’s a common theme, but for some reason I was really curious to see what I had written. I can barely remember a day when Miss Dina was not a part of my life, for example, and I laughed HARD at my whole “I think quitting smoking is really going to stick this time!” diatribe. Jesus. Am I really so predictable?
In any case, I was surprised to see how many things are still true. I still want to go to grad school. I am one step further along that whole “giving up soda” path. (Woo hoo seltzer water!) I still want to do a cleanse. It’s still REALLY exciting to get new glasses. And, strange as this may sound, Bill can still occasionally say or do the perfect thing. (Thanks for the call yesterday, by the way. It was nice to hear your voice.) It was kind of comforting to realize that over the last three and a half years, at least a few things have remained constant. I might crave change, but sometimes it’s nice to have a break.