all flushed with fever, embarassed by the crowd

Okay, here’s the deal. I went into this with a mission. I had everything story-boarded, and it was going to make sense this time. I had a vision of the recently-awoken king from that movie (you know the one) where he stares out at the oncoming hordes and - in that brief moment of hazy, electric silence - says “And so it begins.” I could practically taste the texture of what wasn’t being said. It was sweet and soft and crunchy like old corduroy, and when it hung in the air I got lost in it.

I told a secret that should have stayed secret. I let things be seen and heard that should have been kept tucked away. I put my neck on the chopping block and handed you the axe and said “Make it a clean cut, please”. You didn’t hear me. When asked to repeat myself I giggled and said “Never mind. Just trying it on for size.” I watched others do what I didn’t dare. I found myself trying things that usually aren’t allowed. (She told me you didn’t count, you know. At the time, I believed her. Maybe somewhere someone is saying the same thing about me.)

There were spills and mix-ups and flukes and falls. There were hundreds of people all wearing the same color and not a single recognizeable face. There were people who thought they knew me but didn’t, and there were people I didn’t recognize who’ve known me all along. People got hurt and people got kissed. (Some got a little of both.) Sneaky subversive plans worked perfectly and straightforward honest ones did not. I was no longer at the required safe distance for observing such unstable phenomena. Actions were misinterpreted. Lines were crossed. At the end of it all, I’m right back where I started …

but it was a fun ride.

Wasn’t it?