If i knew you were coming, i’d have baked a…
So, Mickey is coming to visit. What should we do with/to him?
Gene has suggested Monkey Torture, rolling him down Mt. Rainier in a barrel, and taking him to Pike Place Market and turning him into “FishBoy” with the cast-off seafood.
Make him sample the infamous FatKreme(tm) and other Krispy Kreme-inspired epicurean delights.
Play dress up Mikey with all sorts of outrageous period costumes like Burlesque Dancer Mikey, Blushing Southern Belle Mikey and many, many more! Take photographs and transform them in to collectable trading cards! Fun for the whole family!
I’m liking that last one.
This one is waay too cruel & demented -
Give him an egg baby right before he goes to sleep. Tell him it’s really important that takes care of it. After he’s asleep, take the egg baby away from him & use it for an omelette. Once he’s awake, serve him the omelette with the broken egg baby shell on the side of the plate while telling him what a horrible father he is for letting this happen to his egg baby.
When he questions you about the egg baby, vehemently deny that you had anything to do with said horrific crime.
Go door to door in a random neighborhood asking him they want to buy Mikey. If someone asks if that’s legal, tell them that the 13th amendment has been abolished. Bring along Mikey’s resume as a sales brochure. And don’t forget to mention the money back guarantee.
Re-enact the conditioning scene from A Clockwork Orange. As a chaser, re-enact the conditioning scene from the Welcome to the Jungle video.