Wow, it’s been a long

Wow, it’s been a long time. Lest you all think I’m slacking, I would just like to mention that it’s awfully hard to blog at work during the day when I share an office all day - for half of the day, I share an office with someone who has a clear view of my screen, and the other half of the day I share an office with someone who knows that if I’m typing - and it’s not four/five characters at a time and then a big pause (as it is when I use the ticket database) then I’m definitely not working. Very difficult, especially when I really want to make a good impression at my new job. I don’t feel like I’m really allowed to take a break, ever. BUT, at the moment, I will.

Sarah is rambling today. Sweetie, your rambling is glorious. I love it when you babble on for pages about what you’re doing. It makes me happy, and I can live vicariously through you, so please please please don’t stop. Keep up the rambling.

People are calling and emailing me to say hello, re-connect, offer condolences, give me pep talks, etc etc. Partially, it’s wonderful, because I’m getting in touch with people I’d lost. Partially, it sucks, because I hate feeling like I need people in any way. It makes me feel weak. Of course, I know it’s necessary, but still. There’s that niggling little voice in the back of my head that’s saying “They’re only calling because they know you can’t handle it on your own. If you were tough, you wouldn’t even have let on that anything was wrong. It’s all your fault for being a total pussy. Blah blah blah.” If you’re reading this, don’t let this stop you from calling me! I (probably) love you and will be really grateful to hear from you. I’m just having a weird moment of honesty about one of my less attractive emotional features. Ignore me.