18 maja 2001

This is the play that

This is the play that the Jeff has made, let us rejoice and be glad in it

Ugh, how I hate not having internet access at work. I’ve been temping at my own temp agency, and it’s a damn good time (the girls who work at Adams are a total kick) but I miss it all day. Total withdrawal. It’s like heroin.

So, right now I’m working on “Mass Murder” at NW Actors’ Studio (Blackbird Theatre Company). It’s directed by the fabulous Jeff Meyers, who just moved here from Portland, where he was the artistic director of Theatre Vertigo. He began that company with Mass Murder, and he’s using the same script for his debut up here. I play Genene Jones, a nurse from Texas who got her kicks from offing the babies in the PICU (Pediatric Intensive Care Unit) where she worked. The show is a series of monologues, which means that upon coming into this show, I agreed to learn a Texan dialect and memorize a fifteen minute hunk of text. At the beginning, I was totally terrified.

Okay, back up a little. All during “Pearl”, Laurie Jerger talked about how much she loved working with Bret. She’s done… his last four shows? (I don’t really remember.) Anyway, she used to say that it was amazing to her to find a director who spoke “Laurie”. Apparently Bret’s method of directing really hits home to Laurie, and his process is just exactly what she needs to do the best she can possibly do. Now, I loved working with Bret. I thought he was fantastic, and did a great job with our cast, and we had a damn good time. But, it wasn’t quite the telepathic, spiritual connection that Laurie seemed to have with him. And speaking “Laurie” and speaking “Alicia” are obviously going to be different, right? Right.

So, enter Jeff Meyers. I was scared crapless at the beginning of the rehearsal process… I still have this intense feeling of dread before every rehearsal. I’m not prepared enough, I’m not memorized enough, I don’t sound enough like George W. Bush when I speak, I don’t get this yet, I don’t get that, etc etc etc. All those little paranoias that all actors have, multiply by a factor of this-is-a-one-on-one-rehearsal-for-an-hour-and-a-half-so-there’s-nowhere-to-hide. This man has somehow managed to figure out exactly where all those little buttons are that needs to be pushed, and just exactly how to kick my ass in such a way that things made sense. After our last rehearsal, I sat on the 8 on the way home saying “Jesus. He speaks Alicia.” At the same time, it was an exhilarating and terrifying experience. By the end of rehearsal, I was quite literally dizzy. (That was the result of an exercise he had me do which resulted in a total breakthrough as far as the climax of the piece goes.) I am doing the best work I’ve ever done. Three cheers for the power of communication!

Okay, so on to my job woes. I’m temping AT Adams this week, because they liked me so much last time, and they just fired their normal receptionist. (D’oh.) I mentioned I might be interested in the job, and the general manager basically asked me if I would please apply. I had this brief moment of panic - ohmigod, what do I do? I want to start working my way toward an office manager/executive assistant position, I want to learn Quickbooks, I want to learn marketing, I want to do a million things. Do I reneg on all of that so that I can work in this office full of people I freaking LOVE? Or do I give this chance up to someone else and keep trying to find myself a job that’s higher on the resume totem pole? Wtf?!!! In the end, I said no, and they hired LePrea somebody or other. (She was pretty cool.) So, this week I will hopefully be interviewing for THESE AMAZING POSITIONS….

1) Office Manager, Small Downtown Office that plans Conventions for corporations. Learn Quickbooks, learn Dictaphone, manage small office that just happens to be in the same building as my old job that I hated. $25-30K.

or

2) Administrative Assistant, Small SoDo audiovisual office that sells equipment to places like the Bon so that they can play special music out of the ceiling. Low-pressure job. Learn basic AP/AR. $28K.

The guy from Job #1 wants me because I type 100 WPM with 0% errors, and I would do well with his dictastuff, even though I don’t know Quickbooks. However, the person who just left this position would be around to train me in everything, so that would probably be okay. However, that would involve a whole lot of bookkeeping. Do I want to do that? Would I even care? It would be a good skill to have on my resume. Apparently one of the permanent consultants at Adams thought I was such an exemplary receptionist that she personally wanted to represent me. (She explained that the better her candidates were, the more money she made, and she wanted to get me into her stable before anyone else did. Or something.) So now, even though I’m technically hers, other consultants are now finding me stuff too. I’m not quite sure what to make of all of it, but if they can find me a decent job that pays well and lets me learn new stuff, I will love them all forever. (As if I don’t already. They’re so durned cutie.)

I’m having an early-to-early-mid-life-crisis. I think I’m just terrified of the idea of commitment. Not to a person - to a job. Temping is the perfect employment for someone like me, who is petrified by the idea of having to pick one job and stick with it. What if I get tired of it? I just know it’s going to get monotonous in a week and I’ll be itching to move on. Meanwhile, I’m accruing huge bills from ER visits without insurance, and we can’t pay to fix the car. I’m in quite a fix, my friends. And, in the midst of this ideological sh*tstorm, the one real solace is Mass Murder rehearsals. *sigh*

Maybe someday I’ll grow up.

Posted by freesia at 19:47