Mark it
We get up early and go to the Mall of America for hair and makeup appointments. We drink Orange Juliuses and eat Krispy Kremes, and by the time we leave Jenn is in her veil and Carrie and I are wearing Krispy Kreme hats.
(Watching Jenn get her hair done is really hard.)
Back at Jenn’s, we take pictures of Porno Bride, which is what we call her once all of her fancy wedding dress underthings are on. I also snap a picture of pregnant Carrie trying to put on thigh-highs.
At the church, we primp and steam and curl and make up. I do Carrie’s hair in a flip, and Libby and I end up with almost exactly the same hairdo. I get to curl the oldest flower girl’s tendrils when they come loose. We’re goofing around and suddenly it’s time.
Libby’s phone rings. Ryan disappears. We are told NOT TO BLINK when the photographer snaps our picture. Then we hear the music and we’re off.
Dan and I talk about how pretty we are. Libby and Ryan poke each other. As the photographer snaps the picture, I blink. {Snip}
Ten minues in, my feet are killing me. Some cues (Libby: “Is it me? Is it my turn?”) are missed, but all in all it’s beautiful. Over Jenn and Carrie’s heads, I have a straight shot of Jim’s face the entire time. It’s easily the best seat in the house.
As we walk out, I burst into “Foxy!” under my breath and make Dan laugh. I change out of my painful shoes and soon I feel an arm go around my shoulders. It’s Townie - the button-down he’s wearing matches the bridesmaids dresses. Ernie and Ernie’s Woman aren’t far behind. We throw rose petals as Jenn and Jim come by, and it’s gorgeous. Just right.
{Snip - pictures in the park, arriving at the reception}
At our table, Townie points out that his place card says “Guest of Freesia”. He says “I could have been ANYONE!” We decide that the card SHOULD have said “Freesia’s bitch”, so I dig out my label-maker and fix it. Ernie “the serial monogamist” is next. {Snip} Someone at the table lights our bowl of rolls on fire. We make metaphors comparing men and women to bread. I keep spilling my food, and I can’t seem to figure out why.
We eat and dance, and finally Townie, Ernie, Ernie’s Woman (henceforth known as EW), and I venture out to a bar for a drink. E and EW make out. A lot. T and I pretend to watch the baseball game. At one point, T asks what I’m doing later, and I respond that E and EW are taking me back to Northfield. He offers to drive me down, since it’s the only time we’ll get to spend together. {Snip} We return to the find the party gone and the grand exit missed. Oops.
On the way to T’s so he can change, we get really lost. We end up sitting around, listening to music and talking. Ernie calls to check in on me at one point, but by then it’s already late and I’m not going anywhere. I finally get to dance with my wedding date. {Snip} By the time we go to sleep, the sun is up.