you keep evading me with

you keep evading me with your selfrighteous camouflage uniform

Okay, this is the funniest shit ever. This coming St. Patrick’s day, my good friend Sarah Rosenzweig is marrying my friend Mark English. She went to school with Bill, Mark went to school with me, they’re great people, it’ll be fun as hell. They’re moving to San Diego in eight days, and pretty soon the pre-wedding festivities will be starting, and I can’t wait. I’m going to be in two Ole/Carle weddings next year. Always a bridesmaid… well, you know the rest.

So, here’s where the truly funkadelic part of this story comes in. Sarah has three bridesmaids - me, her cousin, and her best friend from waaaaaaayyyyy back. Mark has three groomsmen - his best friend from waaaaaayyyyyyy back, Mike Janus (the ex-roommate of Bill’s who was here all last week), and JOEL LEAKE. Yes, Joele. My pseudo-ex-boyfriend-kinda. The one I “gave up” for Bill. The one whose car was just totaled in the tornado. The same one who’s been on my mind for weeks in that odd “I should call him or email him, but…” way. I can’t even believe it. The same Joele who once told me that he would only come to my wedding, if I ever got married, if I let him be a bridesmaid. He’s a great guy, but, as Gillian would say, a total freakus budeakus. I just hope that he and I get to walk down the aisle together. It would be the only truly appropriate way for the whole thing to work.

I’m torn between being terribly excited to see him (since I haven’t seen him since what, last August?), and being apprehensive about it, because he’s a total drama queen, and nothing is ever what it seems. He’s the king of the cowardly mind games, but can be a damn fun guy to hang out with. So, who knows. It will either be a really fun time, and a great way to reconnect with an old friend, or it will just be one of those “God, so THIS is why I’m not with him anymore” situations. Of course, technically we were never actually together. See why this whole situation is so confusing?

I just told Sarah the bridesmaids need to be wearing green, because I know one of the groomsmen pretty damn well, and there is a high risk of some SERIOUS PINCHING.